Monday, November 24, 2008

Ang mga Estudyante Ko ay Hindi Bobo

Every system operates like a machine. Push the right button and it will start. Use the right controls and it will move the way you expect it to. Overuse it and it'll break down. Carefully and strategically design it and it'll be voted as one of the greatest inventions ever made. Our systems are like machines, subtly controlled by one of the most important facets of life: reality.

We know that something is real when we experience it. We define reality by consolidation of people's ideas and perceptions of what they see, hear, feel, taste and observe. Technically, everything, even the darkest, most negative aspects of humanity, is real.

From an educational perspective, it is a feat for student teachers to be aware of the real secondary school scenario: poor facilities, unruly students, underachievers, insufficiency of learning, unconducive environments and incompetent teachers. This consciousness leads to the openness that the profession which they will soon take is a serious task. This reality brings forth thousands of ideals which may sound too noble, too optimistic or perhaps, even too impossible to deliver.

Slowly, carefully, we are all entering this phase in which we have to use this system to bring changes. With this comes a sad fact which I discovered and felt so disgusted with when I realized it. Our minds have been filled with educational philosophies by the same institution which ironically hired a teacher who does not want us to teach in public schools. I cannot believe this reality.

I cannot believe I am being taught by my own professor never to stay in a secondary school just because the students stink, just because the washrooms are filthy, just because the rooms have no fans--just because of these lame reasons that my own students deal with every single day.
I cannot believe my teacher calls my public high school students BOBO. This degradation is not just addressed to the students, but to the teachers as well. This arrogance is so blearing, it makes me lose my sense of sight and respect towards the "authority" that speaks of filth in front of me.

No, my students and other high school students are not bobo. I can cite a lot of reasons that will prove her wrong but I prefer to say this in full confidence without further explaining everything: No, my students are not bobo.

I cannot believe that my teacher wants me to serve "sophisticated", private institutions sheltering people who look down on those who make their businesses successful. I can't believe that she wants me to fight effortlessly in a pay-high school when in fact, the real battle is in a public school.

I am not a teacher, at least not yet. I am just starting to become a part of a system. Sometimes, I get discouraged when I feel that I should have taught more, I could have offered more to these students of mine; but the more I remember those words from her, the more I feel like a button pushed. I feel insulted. This insult, ergo, makes me want to go further. It's through those sad facts that I realize I really have to continue what I have started; otherwise, my students will be left to a teacher like her, who speaks ill of a profession she has been practicing for almost half of her life.

I do not wish to sugarcoat reality. I plan to reconstruct it. I plan to give students the things they rightfully deserve: recognition, joy in learning and hope. Like a machine, I believe I am pushed the right way and I am going to look at the educational reality with the same philosophies that I have been primarily equipped with. No, my teacher, apparently, you have not enlightened me with your weak and pathetic pieces of advice.

I just want to repeat this:
My students are not bobo.

Friday, November 21, 2008

I'm Sorry

Taken from Angel's Blog:

There’s just one thing I hope people to remember: Talk about a personal problem when you are ready to deal with them for real.

The rule is easy to keep in mind and easy to understand. Start mastering the art of keeping personal things to yourselves until you’re ready to really share them, face the reactions, act on them and let go. Let’s not worry each other. Let’s not do that. Don’t make a fool out of yourself infront of people. Reserve that dignity and spare yourself the embarrassment. You owe that to yourself and to the people who cares about you.

Thank you Te Poy. I'm sorry.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Things I Understand

I understand honesty.

It comes in bold and brave statements to declare honesty as one of the most important things a person must be equipped with. I also understand that people become straightforward and frank when they want to stop something from happening again. There is, however, a thin line between honesty and tact. This is something that apparently, even smart people cannot distinguish.

I understand comparison.

People like it when they are considered "better" as compared to other people. Better in terms of status, abilities, potentials. What they don't like about comparison is when they go a level lower than people being compared to them.

Either way, I hate being compared to others. I HATE it. Why do I hate being compared? It's because I hate feeling so low of myself, which I can easily be provoked to feel.

I understand concern.

I am grateful that, notwithstanding people who have lost faith in me, there are still some left who stay and believe that I can get back on track even if I make irrational decisions.

I understand judgment.

I know how easy it is for people to arrive to conclusions without sufficient analysis of given situations. I understand that even people who you treasure can give false judgment and all you have to do is accept it.

I understand silence.

In silence, a lot of things can be heard. Even those we do not intend to say can be understood. Sometimes, silence gets so ironically and entertainingly loud it can make an individual lose his
will to talk just so he could hear himself. That, is silence.

It is only in understanding deep truth that everyday truth makes any sense.
-Laura Teresa Marquez
Source: Early Morning Conversation

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Death by Cuteness

Girl's Generation - Kissing You

Warning: The following music video has a very catchy tune and might get you hooked. You've been warned.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

The Friendster Problem

Sa totoo lang, marami akung ideya ngayon na masarap sana isulat kaya lang, naisip ku na dahil isyu tu ngayon, makakarelate ang madaming tao. Pwera na lang siguro dun sa mga taong hindi pa alam na naimbento na ng tao ang kompyuter at internet.

Gabi ng Biyernes nun at nasa opisina pa aku. Mga alas diyes na yun at wala na kung studyante kaya ginagawa ku na yung bidyo (Ang hirap magtagalog pota~~) ng kaarawan ni Jing. (Gustu niyu makita? Klik kayo dito.) Medyo seryoso aku nun at bigla akung tinanong ng isa kung katrabaho, si Claire, ng "Uy, anung nagyayari sa Friendster?".

Hmmm. Sinubukan kung silipin ang website (Ahhh, suko na ku~~) sa aking kompyuter. Ayaw nga maakses. Sinabi ku na lang na baka naman inaayos lang yung website.

Sa totoo lang, hindi aku isang dakilang tagasubaybay (Fan. Tama ba?) ng nasabing website. Mas iniintindi ku pa yung Multiply at yung blog ku. O di kaya ay manonood na lang aku sa Youtube ng kung anu-ano kesa aksayin ang oras ku sa pag tingin sa propayl ng mga kaibigan ku na minsan lang rin naman nagbabago. Ginawa ku lang ang akawnt (Mahirap talaga magtagalog. Seryoso.) ku doon para lang may madaling paraan para makausap ku lahat ng kaibigan ku.

Nung gabi rin na yun, marami ang nagtetext at nagpapadala ng personal na mensahe sa akin sa Yahoo! Messenger at nagtatanong kung nabubuksan ku daw ba yung website. Malaking aksaya sa enerhiya kung sasagot pa ku ng hindi. Wala naman din akung gaanong pakialam sa problema na yun. Napakaraming mas mahalagang bagay ang dapat kung bigyan ng pansin.

Linggo na ng gabi ngayon. Marami na ang kakalog-in sa website pero may mga reklamo sila. May mga nagtetext pa rin. Nagpapadala ng mga personal na mensahe sa YM. May mga nagsulat sa mga blog nila. May mga nagsulat ng buletin. Nabura daw ang mga kaibigan nila. Wala na raw ang mga komento sa mga pahina nila. Nakakatawa talaga. Naisip ku na, "Bakit kaya hindi aku nag-aalala sa akawnt ku sa Friendster?". Tama lang yata na ganun di ba?

Magsigising nga kayo. Mas maraming mas mahalagang dapat niyung isipin. Hindi kaya nagiging alipin na tayo ng internet? Sa totoo lang, naisip ku na bakit ngayong may problema ang Friendster, nagwawala ang karamihan ng mga pinoy (mga 88% ng buong populasyon). Eh yung bansa natin daming problema hindi niyu man lang binibigyan ng pansin. Yan pa ang pinili niyung pag-usapan kesa yung mga problema na nakikita niyu na dapat sana ay iniisipan niyu na ng paraan. Matalino raw ang mga Pilipino. Minsan, kahit aku, nahihirapang maniwala dun.

Thursday, November 13, 2008


Practice Teaching Blues

After months of waiting, my practice teaching started last Monday. I had my first time to be introduced as a student teacher at Antonio Maceda Integrated School. I used to fear the students thinking that they don't give due respect to teachers. Until now, I have the same fear.

In the morning there are 4 student teachers, namely: Mariz, Jem, Janerey and of course, me. We all have to start our duty at 7 and stay in the campus until 1 in the afternoon. Just last Tuesday, we were given the opportunity to have our own cooperating teachers. Jem was given to Mrs. Tangal, a first year English Teacher. Janerey was given to Mrs. Maranan, who teaches in the second year level. Mariz was given to Mrs. Valerio, who teaches third year. I was so happy to be supervised by Mrs. Dasco, a fourth year English Teacher. I thought everything would be alright.

I was wrong.

It was Wednesday when my cooperating teacher decided to let me take over three classes in the fourth year level. It was pretty simple, since I just had to give a spelling test and to facilitate a silent reading activity. I felt so pleased because I can feel the students' warmth and acceptance. I was looking forward to having more classes with them.

Later in the afternoon, I asked Ma'am Dasco if I needed to do something for the students, like class records and school register records whatnot.

She said, I would have to wait until December to teach.

Why on earth do I have to wait until December?

Maybe she doesn't trust me enough; or maybe she doesn't want me to ruin her lesson plans.

Whatever her personal reasons maybe, let me give you my own reasons as to why I should not let that happen.

1.) All my groupmates have already started teaching. I am not in the right position to compare my status to theirs but the point is I'm left behind. My other classmates already know how to use the class record and school register and I still don't.

2.) I envy them because they are making their stay at Maceda a worthwhile experience. If you look at my situation, you'd think my cooperating teacher (CT) is mad at me. That sucks bigtime. I try my best to be friendly but I guess it still doesn't work.

3.) I had two semesters for field observation. According to the student teacher's handbook, I can only have two weeks for orientation then I'd have 13 weeks for teaching. I just hope she'll give me that opportunity.

I just want to teach and learn. I just want to experience being loved by the students. I know that there's always a time for everything, but I won't compromise the rest of the time that I have with sleeping, staring at people and doing nothing.

If you look at the system that the school has, you'd say it's not enough. Students are dying to get out of the campus. Guards tolerate the students' bad habit of cutting classes. Teachers shout at students so they would shut up. Implementation of rules is not strict enough. Life there just gets so pretty boring sometimes.

Still, I stick to what I want. This system is just a challenge to face and a problem to solve. We keep on complaining about something we don't like, and complaining is the only thing that we like to do. What's worse is, we complain but in times of action, we hide and spare ourselves from all the trouble.

As I mentioned in a comment for a friend's blog entry, we should never let ourselves be eaten by the spoilage of the system. If ideals are the only things we can hold on to while avoiding educational prejudices, then we must protect these ideals by all means. As teachers, that's what we must do. That's what we should have been doing all this time.


I look at my students' faces everyday and I'm glad they're slowly taking my fears away.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Pre-Birthday Meditations

Everything just happens so fast, you'd notice (or you wouldn't) there are a lot of changes, losses, impermanence and vagueness which carry a big weight in the essence of time. In the long run, you'd find yourself left behind. Thank goodness, I'm slowly catching up.

It was friday night when I felt as if it were the end of the line for me. I was weak--no, even more than that. I was close to being lifeless.

Let me talk about the nearness of death and my upcoming birthday, like nothing else matters but life and its end. Thinking that noone's indispensable, I decided that
if I were to die, god grant me a painless death. The kind that I wouldn't have to moan and scream for people to kill me instead. I just want shame to spare for myself just a few moments before I leave this place. I knew I wasn't supposed to fear dying; but at the back of my mind, while looking at everything I fought for, everything I owed my life to, I would rather refute my view on the matter: no, give me more years to live.

Hence, with my fear of death comes my passion for life. For the past 20 years I have seen myself growing, perhaps not as the kind they expected, but I am proud not to have grown like any other. I am satisfied that I err and I am happy that along the way, I learn.

People may leave, hate me and tear me apart but for 20 years,
I have lived.
I have fought so hard to be here and it's utterly pointless to regress
and ask myself again with never ending whys.
I just want to enjoy and get the most out of what I have now,
and now that I have mentioned it, I realize I have a lot.

Yes. I'm twenteen. Its invalidity speaks aloud what I would still wish to be, but I guess life really has to move on. I need to to focus on practice teaching. I need to redeem myself in terms of academic standings. I need to face greater challenges after graduation.
I want to marry. Yes, I do. *^-^*
Honestly, I'm looking forward to leaving my house
for another one. *^-^*
Most importantly, I need to win back
what's mine--all mine. *^-^*

Come to think about it, being twenty is going to be thrilling after all.

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Thursday, November 6, 2008

God Save The Queen

I stumbled upon this weird Friendster quiz that really caught my attention that's why I decided to post it here.

The rules of the test are simple. Think of one person and you will base your answer upon him/her. Once you start answering, you can't change the person you have in mind.

With that said, take a look at how things turned out.

1. Is he/she your friend on Friendster?
^^ Yes.

2. Why did you choose him/her?
^^ Because I want to.

3. What places do you remember when you think about him/her?
^^ A lot.

4. Dedicate a song to him/her.
^^ Motorhead (Sex Pistols cover) - God Save The Queen

5. Why'd you choose that song?
^^ This is my song for him/her.

6. Is he/she kind?
^^ Yes.

7. Is he/she a good singer?
^^ I choose not to answer that. Hahaha.

8. How about drawing?
^^ I'm not sure.

9. Do you know any actor(s)/actress(es) that look like him/her?
^^ Nope.

10. Are you close friends?
^^ Hmmm. So-so.

11. Have you seen him/her mad?
^^ Nope.

12. How about smiling?
^^ Yes. His/Her smiling face is his/her primary equipment.

13. How about crying?
^^ Not yet. But I'd really love to see that.

14. What does he/she like to wear?
^^ No idea.

15. Does he/she make you happy?
^^ Of course.

16. Have you tried making him/her cry?
^^ Nope.

17. What is his/her favorite food?
^^ No idea.

18. What's his/her favorite song?
^^ I don't know. But he/she is inclined to rock and to anime themes.

19. What do you call him/her?
^^ I can't say that or else everyone will know who he/she is. What a weird question.

20. Your message for him/her?
^^ Right now, I really wouldn't want to say anything to him/her. But I hate you. You are making me think about you so much lately.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Very Random Ideas

1.) Why in the world did some Filipinos go to Greenbelt and celebrate for the election of the new US president?

I was on my way home last night (or morning) at around twelve, I was listening to the radio when I heard that some Pinoys even bothered going to Greenbelt to take part in Barrack's victory.


It's probably because they couldn't overthrow their own president that they decided maybe they could just waste time and effort cheering for...a new hope for a country which isn't theirs.

2.) Who should be blamed when something goes wrong in an organization? Should it be the president, the officer who commits the error or the members who do not cooperate

I just have this simple observation. Whenever there's a mistake, the president gets all the bashing. The president knows it wasn't his freaking fault but he shuts up. The lucky responsible officer (the real sinner) would be spared from all the shame. Let's go the other way around. If there is an achievement, the credit goes to the officer who initiated the idea. The president who does the major work, decides to shut up and continue working. Then let's try another angle: the members have to do something for the org, but they fail to do so. The president is still blamed, neither by the members nor by the officers pehaps, but by org adviser

Yes, it doesn't really happen all the time; but if you were the president what would you have felt?
3.) Imagine yourself having two jobs--both of the same kind, both in the same industry. You profess your undying support for Company A and for that, your boss is very, very pleased. It is stated in your contract that you are not supposed to serve any company other than A. Still for some personal reasons you decide to work in Company B.

Soon enough, by some twist of fate, Company A finds out that you cheated because you are an employee of its rival company, B.
Your boss in A understands that you have your own reasons to do that, but they have to do something because you did not follow what you have signed for in the contract.
What should you do?
A. Nothing. Stick to company B.
Sure, B sucks but there's better compensation so it's not that bad at all.
B. Ask for an apology, a reconsideration and give an explanation.
What should company A do?
A. Nothing. Loyalty counts. The contract counts.
B. Give a warning. Count the strikes. Forgive and take you back.
4.) True Faith is a good Filipino band, if not the best.

Muntik ng Maabot ang Langit

Ang langit sa `yong puso muntik nang mailapit
Nguni’t `kaw na ngayo’y alaalang kay pait
Muntik nang maabot ang langit

What Now?

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Last Day Sa WELS

The WELS People
Lower L to R:
Joseph (UP Dude)-Graduating din siya, at English din ang major niya.
Melanie-Bagong Salta
Grace-Bagong Salta din
Ice (UP Dudette)-Graduate na 24 years ago, ahaha. RN din siya, Yosi Buddy.
EQ (See you around buddy)-Bagong Salta ulit.

Upper L to R:
Angel (TL na naka Nakaorange)-Kabagang, kapatid, BFF
Rezel (Anime Voice na nakapink)-Tinrain ko nung umalis ako last summer
Kaia (Blogger)-Di ko pa ata narinig tong nagtagalog
Teacher Jax (My Coordinator)-Ang cool leader ng lahat ng teachers.
Borgy (Kabagang)-Ang mapagmahal kong kaibigan.
Jing (The Morning Teacher na Tambay pag Gabi)-Ako Yun, yung binuhat ni Papa Borgs
Ayo (Lover ni Leonard)-Taga UP (ata), Curriculum Developer
Gleslie-Di kami close
Evelyn (The 80's Rocker)-Wala akong masabi. Ang ganda ng taste sa music.
Andy (My Papa)-Ang 40-year old teacher na mukhang 25.
Sarah (Bagong Salta)-Kabagang ni EQ.
Leonard-na parang unggoy na isiniksik ang sarili sa picture makita lang ng matino.

Thanks for all the memories. I'm proud to be a part of this company.